Wedding Wednesday: Zimmerman Wedding

So, I'm so happy Aleks is letting me guest post about my engagement, wedding, and marriage! Being married has been such a crazy adventure already (we celebrated our one year this January!) and so I just want to start out by congratulating Aleks on her soon-to-be wedding! It's such an exciting lead-in to the best experience in life: the marriage you share with your best friend.
Josh has been my best friend a mere four years, but it feels like we've known each other forever. Probably because we made the crazy choice to move in together after only three months of dating! CRAZY!

But it was such a great choice. Originally, we lived with his mother, stepfather, and two sisters. And then we moved in with his father. And to lighten all the stress of living with his family, who are so different from my own, I started making jokes about how we had to get married immediately and move out on our own. When we're together, we make rash decisions that end up making our lives so much greater!

Getting engaged wasn't like that. It took two years until we moved into our first apartment. Six months later, Josh finally felt independent enough to consider marrying me. We had talked about it a bit but nothing too serious when one night, we were just sitting in our living room dilly dallying. Super casually, Josh asked me if I was ever going to get up and make dinner. I made some sarcastic remark about how I didn't have to make his dinner, since I wasn't his wife, and he asked, "well why not?"

Like it was my fault. Like I didn't "propose" every other day to that boy!

No matter. I was thrilled! Ecstatic! Our family? Less than happy. According to them, we aren't old enough. We didn't know enough about the world or ourselves. But I strongly disagree.

Josh and I have grown so much since we first started dating. We've always acted so much older than we are and been so much more confident in who we are and what we want out of life than most of our peers. So for us, any sort of "blessing" that our family thought  we were looking for was unnecessary.

We were (and are) sure we love each other, and positive we'll be together for a very long time. And know we want to have babies and grow old together.

So we didn't care about the lack of enthusiasm from our family - we were engaged. We picked out a pretty ring for me to wear, and we really should have eloped, but instead, we decided to give ourselves three months to plan a "ceremony" at the courthouse, and then a reception for our family and friends. I picked out a matron of honor, and he picked out a best man to sign the legal documents. I made all the decorations with my sister-in-laws' help, and our mothers cooked all the food. I'm so thankful for the people in our lives who helped to make me feel like a million bucks on my wedding day, while others did some pretty terrible things to crush the immeasurable amount of happiness and merriment that we should have been feeling on the day of our wedding and reception.

To be honest, it's extremely painful to think about everything that went wrong and the number of people we learned we couldn't trust at such an important time in our lives.

But it gives me such incredible joy to remember the way my husband was so understanding of the sporadic bridezilla moments I had (particularly when I informed him that I not only called my former matron of honor during my bridal shower, but proceeded to chew her out over the phone, quite loudly, in front of all of the ladies in our families). And how he reminded me that it didn't matter what went wrong during our reception, or that a few of his cousins were bashing it later that night on Facebook, because while we managed to invite some of the worst people we know, we also invited a lot of people who loved us, who clapped and cheered when we danced our first dance to Queen's "You're My Best Friend", who watched as we cut our beautiful cake, who clinked their glasses with their forks to make us kiss, who spoke about how delicious the disgusting sparkling grape juice was, who made celebrating our new marriage the best time of our lives, and who continue to support one of the best decisions we ever made: to get married super young and rock out the past year, even when we had to move back in with his mother because he was such a supportive husband that he unknowingly gave me permission to quit my job.

(Don't worry. We moved back out in December, so we didn't spend the entire first year of marriage being less than adults!)

Okay. Not the point.

Anyways, I have some advice for Aleks and any other bride-to-be: on your wedding day, try not to be torn down by anything that goes wrong, or to let anyone get to you if they can't appreciate what you've done to make your ceremony and reception personal and all about the love you share with your guy! Allow yourself to adapt, not only on your wedding day to the different stresses that will fly your way, but afterward, and in all the years you'll spend married to your best friend. Adapt. And use every new adaptation to become the best you can be as individuals, and as a married couple, so you can build the biggest and brightest of futures together, hand in hand.

thank you so much Leslie for sharing you wedding, and your advice!!


1 comment:

  1. You're totally welcome! It's a blast guest posting. I should do it more often!


Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are his.