Everlasting Beauty


What makes you beautiful?
What makes your friends beautiful?
Is it their designer jeans?
Is it your salon style hair?
Do you feel more beautiful when you receive 
compliments and attention?

Self esteem is something I have struggled with my 
entire life. 
Either I'm not pretty enough, my clothes aren't
fancy enough, or I'm not skinny enough. 

1 Peter 3:3-4 Says:

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, 
such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry
and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, 
the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, 
which is of great worth in God's sight." 

God isn't saying  he wants us to wear sweat pants and slippers everyday. Although it does sound like the dream life to me. 

I think God is saying no matter what you wear you will never be beautiful with a bad attitude. 
You can wear the most expensive Versace gown and the most glittery glitter pumps and have a million nose jobs, but without a kind and gentle heart you are just playing dress up. 

I still struggle with self esteem. It is hard not to in a world of magazines, movies, and commercials telling you to look and act a certain way. But I will you tell you one thing, I have come a long way. I am {almost} at a "healthy" weight. My appetite is starting to increase AND I don't even look at the calorie count anymore. God has started something amazing with my life. He has brought my heart and my body back to him. I was lost, sad, and confused about where my life was headed. I wasn't 'brilliant' enough for a college degree. I wasn't athletic enough to play sports. I didn't know a lick about music. What did I have left?

My blonde hair? My fair skin? 
What I didn't know was that I had love. I had the love of our Lord the whole time and I never once thought to ask for help. 
I thought if I was the 'pretty' one everyone would like me. 
False.
I hurt a lot of people. 
I said a LOT of mean things to those I loved. 
I starved my body of food. I starved my soul of love.
I shut everyone out that tried to help me. 
I hung out with the wrong people and got involved in the wrong stuff. 
I teased and bullied girls that didn't deserve to be treated that way. 

Isaiah 55:8-9 reads:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, " declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

After much soul searching and reflection I realized I needed help. I needed medical help and Gods help. I needed the words to ask for forgiveness from those I hurt. I needed the courage to look at myself in the mirror and see what God sees. It took a very, very, long time for that to happen. 


"It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me stand on the heights." Psalm 18:32-33


I am thrilled to say I am not that person anymore. I am ashamed I have ruined so many relationships in my life but God is still working on that. I am proud to say it has almost been 5 years since I started my new life. I was an ugly, ugly, person. I was trying to guard my heart but in doing so I shut out the one relationship I needed most. God. 


I am still rebuilding my health. There are times when I forget to eat and it doesnt phase me but the Lord sneaks little reminders in. I still struggle with gaining weight, honestly I think I always will. But I know my outward appearance is trivial compared to whats in my heart now. 


Beauty isn't what you see ON someone. It is what you see IN someone. 

Of course I wished I knew then what I know now, but God had a plan. Judging other people based on their looks or outfits is ignorant. 

I admit to often talking AT people and looking AT people. I plan to listen more, praise my friends good deeds and achievements more, and intentionally give grace. 


Ask yourself this weekend:
How can I think more like God in how I look at other people?

Phil. 4:6

"Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done."



6 comments:

  1. this is an awesome post, Aleks. May God continue the awesome work He is doing in your heart. Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is worthy of praise - Proverbs 31:30

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  2. Love this post. Love your honesty and how God is working in your life! :)

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  3. Beautiful post. Thanks for your honesty :)

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  4. Beautiful post. Thanks for your honesty :)

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  5. Beautiful post. Thanks for your honesty :)

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  6. Beautiful thoughts and I truly think this is the direction in which God leads us all.

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Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are his.